Are You Comfortable?

Are you comfortable?How do you feel right now? Are you tired? Maybe a little hungry? Do you need to use the restroom? Are you reading this because you are bored? These are all reasons I have used to get out of working or doing whatever it is I was supposed to be doing at the time. In school I would wait or arrange for conditions to be perfect before ever starting on a homework assignment, which meant that I hardly ever did them (or at least did them well).

How comfortable do you think your muscles get when you work out lifting weights or when you run or jog? How comfortable does your mind get when it is forced to think new thoughts, create new solutions, or solve problems? Before your muscles can grow, they have to expand and rip. And when your mind learns a new thought, it creates a little ripple in your brain. It has to ripple because its expanding, just like your skin gets rippled when it soaks up water in the tub or the pool.

In the same way, getting out of your comfort zone will help you expand and grow your self as a person. You may have heard preachers or motivational speakers talk of going out on a limb, having faith, trusting in yourself, or pushing the envelope. T. Harv Eker says that if you are not growing, you are dying. This may be an extreme example, but it helps set the tone of what I am trying to convey to you.

If you never try anything new, how can anything new happen to you? If you don’t like where you are now, then get moving and do something else. You are probably not being forced to do something or live somewhere. It may be your current situation, but it does not have to be your future situation. T. Harv Eker talks about the “corridor,” which is the area just inside the field in which you would like to enter. Even if you don’t get exactly where you want to go, it begins by getting your foot in the door, or simply put, taking that first step.

Sometimes the first step is the hardest. This is when your mind is filling your spirit with lead by pouring out it’s unlimited supply of limiting thoughts. Learn the mechanisms to recognize and let go of limiting thoughts. Your thoughts are your own and can be manipulated how you see fit. Nothing has meaning unless you assign it meaning. Just because you have a thought does not make it real or valid or worth keeping. Learn to let it go and start to cultivate the thoughts that support the position you want to be in. Get out of your comfort zone.

Try Something New

Tomorrow, take a different path to school, to work, or to the public library. Make it a point to talk to one person you’ve never met and ask them at least three questions about themselves. Pay attention to your thoughts. Only allow thoughts that support whatever your goals are. Thoughts that work against you, realize that they are not true, then let them go. If you do these things you are on a path towards a life that is closer to your new reality and your goals. You have taken the first step.

Like Attracts Like

like-attracts-likeConverse to magnetism, in life, like objects tend to attract like objects. Good attracts good that the same way bad can attract bad. Trips to the doctor beget trips to the hospital and so on. Have you ever heard the expression that the more money you have, the more money you’ll make? That’s because money also attracts more money.

Pay attention to the thoughts you have right now. Are they good thoughts or bad thoughts? Are they thoughts of growth and improvement or limiting thoughts or thoughts of despair. How do we know what thoughts in our head are true and which ones we just placed there? Just because you have a thought in your head, doesn’t mean it’s true.

If you follow this thought out a little further you can see that if your thoughts are not true, then you can place thoughts there that are more fitting to your desired outcome. Some self-help books call this “self talk”. Some people view this as lying to yourself. I am proposing that your mind is always lying to yourself, so why not use the thoughts that it is telling you for good instead of detriment?

Let’s take a moment to go back to the thought about like attracting like and view some specific examples in science, nature, and in social settings.  If you grab a glass of water, then drop some oil in it, watch as the oil at first dissipates, then collects back together as the molecules are more attracted to each other than to the water.  Now, go outside, find a lake or pond and watch as the fish congregate together or how the “birds of a feather flock together”.  And lastly, visit a high school cafeteria and see how the children naturally segregate into various groups among the tables.

It’s the same way with adults and in life.  Rich people are more comfortable hanging around rich people. Poor people are more comfortable hanging around poor people.  It’s not that they can’t or don’t mix, but there is a level of uncomfortableness with this mixing.  I’ll be discussing comfortableness in a following post, but for right now I just want you to see how like objects are naturally attracted to like objects.

Now that you can see how it is naturally occurring, can you see how money naturally attracts more money?  Let me give you some practical examples by starting with nothing.  A man goes out and offers his services in return for pay.  This person is now considered experienced at what he does and can advertise this fact in either a resume or in an advertisement.  The man is now able to offer his service for a higher pay or in higher volume, thereby making more money.  This is active income, but if he manages his money well, the money will begin accruing passive income through savings and investments.  This man has now gone from having nothing to having something by doing one thing well and attracting more of it.

You may have heard of Dave Ramsey’s debt snowball.  Well the snowball is an example of like attracting like.  Paying down debt begets paying down more debt.  And once the debt is gone, the snowball can then turn into a snowball that instead of “beating debt” begins to “build wealth,” as Dave would say.  I highly encourage you to check out Dave Ramsey’s books.  They have helped many people create a plan for how to get control of your personal finances.  Dave likes to say that if you don’t manage your money, your money will leave you.  This is akin to the idea of what you don’t manage, you don’t value, which is what I recently blogged about in The Law of Focus.

The Law of Focus is much about like attracting like. Because you are focusing on something, measuring it, and valuing it, when you come across more of it, you will collect it or because you are so fond of it, others will bring it to you. This could be in the form of more work or just word of mouth (free advertising). For example, just like in the story of the man who had nothing and began offering up services, once you start down a path, people around you notice your path, and start to help make it straight for you. This is only natural. For those who don’t know which path to go down, that is the subject of a future blog post.


The Confidence-Success Loop

confidence-success-loopThe “con” in con-man is short for confidence.  Con-men are successful because they are confident.  They “fake it until they make it” one might say.  This same confidence can and is used by successful law-abiding citizens every day.  What I am suggesting is that there is such a strong connection between success and confidence that once one enters the loop through solid work, the loop begins to feed itself.

Lets talk for a moment about what I have identified as the entry point, “solid work”.  This is the preparation, the due diligence, the hard data gathering that backs up the confidence.  Yes, you can “fake it until you make it”, but those who make it eventually create solid work to back up their confidence.  Without it, the faking can only last so long.

Now, if you’ve heard or read Jim Collins talk about “the flywheel concept”, you can see how this kind of applies here.  In the beginning, it takes more solid work to get your confidence up, but once you have it, the past successes will make you more confident.  Confidence will then lead to more success, but if you don’t keep backing it up with solid work, the flywheel will eventually stop spinning.

Danielle Franklin of says that “Once you earn new experience, the confidence increases,” and I would have to agree. Whether you are in stocks, sales, teaching, politics, or management, managing your confidence-success loop is critical.